the depression monster

Hello again to all

While I’m alone il tell you a bit about myself. I’m a 39 yr old woman from Wigan. I have a 19 yr old daughter and her name is Brittany.

I have suffered with depression for as long as I can remember. Even as a kid I felt depressed. Sometimes I feel so bad I honestly feel as though I can’t go on. Sometimes I feel so bad I just want to hurt myself to relieve some of the pain and pressure from my brain. I have always felt ashamed and embarrassed to talk about how I feel as depression is still a taboo subject. No one wants to listen to someone who constantly feels like shit. When I’m alone it is worse because then you are just thinking thinking thinking! Bizarre emotions and thoughts almost drown u and most of the time you don’t even know why. It’s also when you start dwelling on the past. I see depression as a vicious monster. An awful being that could swallow you whole.

As a child my fave film was aliens. I remember the line ” my mommy always told me there are no monsters, no real monsters but there are,aren’t there”.

Yes there is! It’s called the depression monster. It’s doesn’t bleed acid. It doesn’t turn into a bat or a wolf . Those are monsters of fiction. The depression monster can’t be killed with a stake to the heart or a siilver bullet. But maybe we can find some way to kill it together. By talking and reaching out to each other without the fear of prejudice we can start to enjoy life and heal.

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